


Overwhelmed With Gratitude

by ohmakemeahercules



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Happiness all around, pre wedding reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-08
Updated: 2017-05-08
Packaged: 2018-10-29 10:21:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10851993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmakemeahercules/pseuds/ohmakemeahercules
Summary: Emma reflects on her journey to the altar the night before the wedding. (missing scene between 6x19 and 6x20)





	Overwhelmed With Gratitude

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this really quickly (within a day, which is a record for me). I had feels about Emma's thoughts. Title is borrowed from Thank God I Found You-Mariah Carey, Joe and 98 Degrees. I've been listening to it a lot lately and thought it fit the occasion. I don't own anytihng OUAT related or the song title. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy and feel free to leave a comment. ask box is open at ohmakemeahercules.tumblr.com.

Overwhelmed with Gratitude

 

Emma Swan grunted, turning over in her king sized bed for the umpteen millionth time. _Damn you and your superstitions, Killian._ Her husband to be had left hours ago, citing the age old adage of bad luck if the groom saw his bride before the wedding ceremonies. She never put much stock in those old wives tales. Without the solid warmth of her pirate beside her, she was cursing the fates even harder. They’d slept in the same bed every night since he moved in a few months ago. Tonight was proving to be the hardest one. _Get through this and you’ll never sleep alone again._

 

A restless heart transitioned to a restless mind. At times, her happiness felt like a dream. She’d constantly suffered all her life. One abandonment after another, she built up walls. Killian waited until she was ready, then helped her break them down. Now she was ready to bear her heart in a public ceremony. _What have I done to deserve this, universe? How did I go from professional loner to being surrounded by love on all sides? What changed?_ She pictured her dinky Boston apartment blowing out a solitary candle. She had no idea a single wish had started her on a path to a quaint seaside town with full of storybook characters. _They say everything happens for a reason._ ‘What a load of shit,’ she'd think to herself. No one could explain why family after family returned her to foster care. As the years went by, she blamed herself. Something was wrong with her; what other explanation could there be?

 

Then the most unlikely person proved her wrong. A centuries old pirate who understood the meaning of abandonment. He was the first (and frankly only) person who continually prioritized her needs first. He loved her despite her flaws and atrocious betrayal. Both came from broken pasts but worked through difficult times and healed together. Tomorrow he would become her husband and she his wife. The thought overwhelmed her. Not in fear; she’d never been more certain in choosing a romantic partner in her life. In the back of her mind, she still was the orphan shuffled between multiple houses, never settling in one place or bonding to other humans. This man loves her steadfastly and unconditionally. She never thought that kind of love existed for her. _I’m really getting married tomorrow. To a man who adores me, never abandons me, always believes in my abilities. I don’t deserve this._

The buzzing of her phone jarred her thoughts. She glanced at the screen. Killian’s name appeared. _Can’t sleep, either huh? We’ll keep each other awake._

“Miss me, Captain?” She answered.

 

“So what if I do?” He replied. “For once I regret following superstition.”

 

“You can come back, you know.”

 

“Too late now. I’m a man of my word.”

 

 _Stop being so honorable, dammit._ “But I miss you.”

“I miss you, too, love. Truly, one night pales in comparison to all the nights we’ll make love, fall asleep in each other’s arms then wake up at first light.”

 

“That sounds amazing! Why can’t it start now?”

 

“Patience, Swan. Our time will come. Besides, we need rest. Can’t have you falling over during our first dance.”

 

Emma half sighed. “Okay. I have been thinking a lot. I keep coming back to one thought.”

 

“Aye?”

 

“The lost orphan still can't believe someone loves her enough to make a life long commitment.” Tears misted her eyes. “God, I'm crying already and the wedding isn't here yet.”

 

Killian hummed in understanding. “It's alright, Swan.”

 

“I was always dispensable. Just another mouth to feed, just another kid to find a home for, just another name in the computer. No one was ever proud of their association with me. Now you're about to declare your love in front of the whole town.”

 

“My affections towards you have been the worst kept secret in Storybooke, love.”

 

Emma chuckled and sniffed. _Making me laugh while I cry, one of Killian’s specialties._ “True. You see what I mean, though? You're proud of your feelings. All my life it's been, oh that foster kid, oh the girl no one wants.”

 

“I do see, because I experienced the same. Mostly derogatory expletives to express his distaste of the job I was doing. No one knew my real name for hundreds of years after Liam and Milah died. Until you.”

 

Emma imagined that moment: peasant disguised Killian tied to a tree while she held a pocket knife to his throat. “You introduced yourself as Killian Jones first. Why?”

 

“The first time I looked in your eyes, I saw me. A vulnerable being hiding behind the tough act. Thus beginning my attraction to you. I thought we might connect if I was real from the start.”

 

Emma smiled even as her tears continued. “Did you think this would happen?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Us getting together, having a relationship?”

 

“No. I hoped for a spark but pushed it down after you chained me up there. I tried to tell myself I didn't care. Of course, that was a lie.”

 

“As big as ‘A one-time thing?’”

 

“Same caliber, yes. You and I were different people back then, Swan. We both had a lot of growing to do.”

 

“It seems like a lifetime ago. I don’t recognize the woman I was. She was sealed off from every possible emotion.”

 

“As was I.”

 

Emma cleared her throat. “We’re really getting married tomorrow.”

 

“Aye. We are.”

 

Killian’s certainty relaxed her nerves. This ceremony would happen, evil fairy lurking in town be damned. She and her pirate are happy and want to celebrate. “I love you, babe.”

 

“And I love you, Swan. I’ll tell you so for the rest of our days.”

 

Emma blushed. His romantic professions still prompted flutters in her stomach. She hoped that feeling would never go away. “Dream about me.”

 

“Likewise. Remember why we’re doing this: that vow we just exchanged seconds ago. Snow might be a bit … overzealous to put it mildly. Our love is the basis and meaning in all this.”

 

“If you were here, I’d kiss you for that!”

 

“We can kiss as often as you like after the ceremony. As long as it’s fit for public consumption.”

 

“What about behind closed doors?”

 

Killian hummed. “Well, that’s where the real fun begins.”

 


End file.
